One
thing you can’t take away from Mercy Johnson Okojie is the fact that she is
richly blessed in the art of interpreting roles. An A-list actress that has
become about the most celebrated and the most- sought-after actress in Nollywood.
This also makes her one of the highest paid actresses in the country. Recently,
the adorable, down to earth mother of two spoke exclusively to City Rovers’
Kunle Rasheed about unusual things around her marriage, husband and also the
joy of being a mother. Read and enjoy…..
(1)
When You had your first baby, you granted an
interview saying you’ll have another as soon as she is one.It came to pass; now
should we be expecting another baby in few months time, now that you new baby
is 6 months? My mother–in-law says when someone
prays for you, just say amen, so I am going to take this as a prayer. In fact,
when I said I will have another baby when Purity turns one year old, obviously
I said that because I just wanted to
have all my kids at once and get to having fun with my husband. Yes, I said so
but it just happened coincidentally.
What has
kept the flame of your marriage glowing?
I am a
very passionate person, I would say we as married people, we don’t sit down and
plan it, and it’s just that I am passionately crazy about my husband. In fact,
I am in love with my husband’s spirit and not even his body or his person. My
husband has a beautiful spirit and that’s what I love about him, and when you
love that about your husband, all other things just shine out. Basically, appreciating
who he is has made us go this far, so it’s not been an issue at all. From the
day we met, the way I lay down on his chest when he holds me is still the way
he holds me and kiss me today so nothing has changed at all. It’s still the way
he loved me then and it’s still the same now.
Is there
any flaw(s) you see in him as human? My
husband could be annoying to some point because he can tell you the truth that
can hurt you. But even when I say flaws, the flaws are like elements of
perfection, and not in a negative way. In fact, my husband is the closest thing
to God in existence for me and I will say it anytime over and over again.
During
the course of your relationship or marriage, have you ever checked his messages
or his phones or memos maybe out of curiosity? No,
I have never done that; in fact, as my own policy, I will never do that because
I was never taught that way.
What
comes to your mind when he stares at a beautiful lady maybe while driving or
while at any event? He hasn’t ever done that before but it’s
not actually a problem, people actually get scared, then they don’t know who
they are, but if you know who you are, I don’t think you will be bothered about
things like these. Because I know where he comes from and how far we have gone,
it will be really silly for me to worry about anything in retrospective.
If you
had not met your husband; would you be waiting till now or you would have been
taken by another? Let
me explain something and it sounds too absurd but it’s true. If I hadn’t met my
husband, I would have still met my husband and when I was growing up; I already
imagined the kind of husband I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, so
that’s why I said if I had not met my husband, I would have still met my
husband.
Is there
anything you would love to change about your husband? Hmmm… what will
I change, I think there is just one thing I might change about my husband, it
will be to chain him to a chair and make him see one of my movies to make him
see how much I am passionate about what I do. My husband has never watched any
of my movies from day one. That’s just one thing I might like to change about
him, tie him down so that he can watch one of my movies from the start to the end,
which would be nice.
What
does love mean to you? As
a single lady, love takes a different meaning and when you’re married, it’s
also entirely different. I would summarize love as a sacrifice because I have
got to a point where I never thought I would ever see love or sacrifice this
much for love and I think the only reason I will sacrifice so much is because I
love him too much. Every morning, I wake up I see his face and every time I go
to sleep, I see his face and I also see my kids, definitely I know I have made
the right choice.
Do you
guys quarrel like normal couple despite the rosy pictures you paint out there? Yes, we do but we have
ways of resolving issues and then even when it’s that bad, we just laugh and
joke about it, so when we are quarrelling, and I just finished my prayer, my
husband will just hold my waist and call me a prayer warrior, and I will say
leave me alone because I am angry, but at the end of the day, I just laugh and
my anger is gone and we are back to normal.
Can you
remember what you’ve done to upset him in the past?
Not
really, for example in 2009; my husband looked at my phone and saw two saved
numbers one as ‘My Life’ and the other ‘My Hope’ and immediately he changed his
face, but then when he checked the number and saw it was his numbers, he later
smiled.
Do you guys have pet names for yourselves since
you said you stored his name as hope and life while dating?
I have pet names; sometimes, I call him my
life, sometimes I call him my hope and sometimes I call him a whole lot of
weird names just to get on his nerves and to make him smile and love me more
every day of our lives.
How did
your husband’s family accept you being an actress?
I think my
husband’s family are quite exposed; they are in tune with what’s happening
around. They are very vast and exposed, so it wasn’t like a problem at all. In fact;
I have the sweetest mother-in-law ever, and my father-in-law is also very
understanding. Yes, they’ve heard a lot of things about me, but it didn’t
bother them, they gave me a chance, they got to know me and I was accepted
because they never judge the book by its cover, and moreover, I think I prove
people wrong in so many ways and because of this, they cut me some slack and
ever since then, it’s been so much fun between us and all the family. Character
is like a smoke, you can’t cover it, if you are a bad person; it will show and
if you are a good person, it will definitely show also, so I guess that was my
own case. My character became the judge of whom and what I am, and it turned
out good.
Do men
still make passes at you despite being married? No, never! since I got married; I have never had that problem
of men making passes at me or trying to get to me in some ways, I have been
blessed because I have carried myself in a manner that I am married, I only
have eyes for my husband and I think a whole lot of people know and see this,
so they respect my marriage and let me be.
What
(is) are that eroctic thing you’ve done outside the confines of your home to
show that you love each other?
I
think kissing doesn’t mean you love this person, I just don’t think of doing
anything without him when he is not there, so even if without telling you that
my husband does mean a lot to me, the way I carry myself will show you that he
means the whole world to me. Outside; we do a lot of things together like
affectionate things. I think we do basically everything together; even when we
go for dinner, unconsciously we do things that you would not expect.
What if
tomorrow your husband decides to do something weird like being a homosexual or
start doing something you don’t expect from him? These things are
impossible, it can’t happen because there is always a starting point, so for us
or me, it’s impossible, it won’t start not to talk of happening at all. Please,
let’s leave that.
Most
relationships are based on trust and being faithful; have you ever suspected or
sat down to think that your husband is doing something or question his
faithfulness to you or his trust at one point in your marriage. Has this ever
happened? Even
when my husband is wrong, to me he is always right. The bible says that if you
have a faithful husband; then you should be a faithful wife, how do I explain
this? those thoughts just don’t come into play in our marriage at any point in
time. In fact, they don’t exist at all. It’s not by how many times he is at
home but as long as the most important thing in his life remains the most
important thing in life; so I don’t foresee or bring out any problem when there
is none. So, we are good.
How many
kids are you guys planning to have?
Four to
be precise; according to our plans and very soon, another one will come when my
baby, Henry is of age. Then, we can think and plan to have another child.
What are
you wishing for in life that you have not achieved?
The
biggest thing or prayer I need to pray for in life is just for things to just
be as perfect as it is now. Nothing is important aside from my home; in fact I
want to do other things but those other things can never take the space. The
three people I have in my life right now and I am talking about my husband and
my two children, nothing can take their place. I just want things to just be
the way it is now; that will be my prayer.
Whenever
you hear or see marriages that were celebrated crash; don’t you get scared
about your own marriage, how does it make you feel?
Have you
read the diary of a Black Mad Woman whereby the husband stands on a pole and
says how wonderful and good his wife is and when they get in the car; he tells
her to get the hell out of the car? I think it is a personal thing to be
sincere; it hurts me when I hear and see situations like this. If I have
issues, normally I’ll say okay and we would work it out and it’s resolved. Some
people don’t have this perseverance and patience to endure this; so they just
make it a whole of issue. It’s how you handle your affairs in your home.
I am
sure you have celebrity friends whose marriages have broken, does it affect you
or don’t you feel sad in any way for them, how does it make you feel?
I don’t
have celebrity friends that have their marriages broken. Well; what I’m trying
to say is that I think the press is too hard on the celebrities because you
guys worry too much on other people’s problems. That already is an issue but
above all; I feel bad and everything in life has two sides, one you learnt from
and the one you get refrained from and for me, I take the learning part seriously because when I see a friend that does something and I
didn’t like it, I tend not to do that to my husband because he might not like
it; so everything is like a learning process for me and no one is perfect but for our kind of profession, we
celebrities you pry too much. You guys are like our biggest problem. Sincerely,
you guys are like the intermediary between us and the public but you don’t ever
try to paint us in a good light but you guys deserve a lot of prayers for that
but please, I will beg you guys-the media to pry less. For example, I went for
an event, a wedding and I didn’t go with my husband and before you knew it,
they said I had problems with my marriage. The media should try better for us
celebrities.
What’s
the greatest gift your husband has given you?
My two
kids and two more gifts are still coming on the way and then maybe one more
later.
Have you
ever been jealous when you see your husband around beautiful ladies or do you
make an issue out of nothing?
Yes I do, I make an issue out
of nothing just because I just want him to pet me. I have never been jealous of
him with any lady. In fact, I trust him 100%, he is the love of my life and I
definitely know I’m the love of his life.
What’s
next for your marriage, where do you and your husband see yourself in the
future? I think our biggest
prayer is to have this stability in our marriage for many more years to come
and to delve into other things together as a couple, having all my kids and
getting back to my career. In fact, we have a lot of ambition and aspiration
and we pray that we don’t have any negative influencing intruders and also pray
that we continue to have peace and love for eternity.
Do you
confide in your family when you have issues? Definitely
no, but sometimes when he makes decisions I don’t like, then I confide in my
mother-in-law, but if I confide in my own mother, she would definitely want to
protect me as her daughter and in the process give a bad decision and advice. I
tell my mother-in-law because she knows as a wife that I mean well and because
I love my husband and my family.
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